I won't lie,
I have been cheating.
I have been cheating in dreams with things with bedrooms
for eyes and wings for legs. Things that do not know up
from down and stains for soap. I have been
touching myself in ways that beg
description and beg for
limits.
I have been cheating.
I will not lie.
Shadow slipped and zipper skinned and bloody eyed
watching the windows for squad cars and detectives.
I have screwed
up and made up and been sucked
down in to whatevers. Sad things,
happier by absentee suns and happy things
sadder for no one to see them
done.
I have been unscrewed and
burned and turned and hammered and sober
enough to be sworn in
to some kind of forgotten church
with the gods and the gods and the gods and the
stained glass.
I won't lie,
I've been gone
so far
some day
I will
have children
to tell
the day inside the days
I spent
was
without a lie.
